I've written a few posts now and I think it's time to finally reveal what the title actually means. Although it appears that I just wanted some foreign language title to wow people and show off how smart I am (in reality I had to look it up to even know what it means), I actually came across the phrase Coram Deo in a book I was reading. While reading the book, I learned that the Latin phrase means literally "presence of God." I loved the idea of being in the presence of God and also liked the way Coram Deo sounds and I like the way it looks. So where did the Ex come from? The Ex is Latin for "from." When you put the three words together - Ex Coram Deo - you get the literal translation "from the presence of God."
This blog is meant to discuss some of the issues that I'm thinking about and experiencing, but ultimately it's about what God is teaching me as I come to Him with my life. What I get from those times of being in His presence I will write about and that is why I purposefully chose to add the Ex to the title. Thus, "from God's presence" I write these things; Ex Coram Deo.
Recording my time spent with God has been a practice of mine for some time. I learned the importance of journaling while I was in college and struggled to make sense of a number of things that were happening to me. I had a difficult time with the transition to school life and dealing with some of the social aspects of being in college. I thought I had no one to talk to about this stuff because it seemed that everyone was well adjusted and having a great time. So, I turned to coffee shops, scriptures, and journals. It was there that I began to meet God and experience His presence.
I would spend hours pouring over the Bible, soaking it all it. As I read the Bible, I kept track of the people, places, and events in my journal in hope of understanding the overall message of the scriptures better. It was in those studies of the Word that I began to see the depth of human existence and realize how complex life really was. It was in those coffee shops that I began to love the Bible. I began to learn more about the nature of God and began to see His fingerprint throughout the world. It was in the presence of God when I could sense that something supernatural was happening inside of me for which no amount of words could adequately describe. But that didn't keep me from trying. To the journal I went, trying to give words to something that couldn't be written about and it seemed that the more I tried to describe the presence of God, the more I cheapened the experience. However, something was happening as I wrote. I crossed over from reading about God to resting in Him. It was the journaling about the presence of God that made that experience more real.
When we journal and keep record of our life in God (by the way, there is no such thing as "spiritual life" as opposed to "regular life." We have but one life and it is a spiritual life. The only degree is whether it is dead or alive.) we are able to see the progression, or the regression of that life. It's in journaling that we can record our times of prayer with God; times we hear from God and times we give to God our very hearts. One thing we should not do is forget what God has done. Although it seems like we could never forget, we do. Our memory fails us and we are left to rest in faded feelings and vague notions that something great happened. Those great moments must be saved and treasured. For when we encounter a time when we begin to think the terrible thought that God is absent from us, or worse yet, that He is something other than He is, we can turn to those journals and see written in our own hand the things that we experienced - human history written by God's own hand, of which we are participants.
When I read the Bible I am in the presence of God learning about men and women who experienced God's presence. When I journal, I reflect on what it was like. This blog is a public journal entry Ex Coram Deo.
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